Gratitude: “Thanks a Lot!” Gracious or Ungracious? (BW)

Calling all Negative Nellies! Let’s tawk gracias, danka, merci. This week our entire nation stops everything, supposedly, to give thanks. Yet I’ve recently heard it sarcastically being referred to as The Season of Dysfunction (which, FYI, all families aren’t) — so will your specific brand of gratitude be genuine or adding to the dysfunction at a food table near you? A wise woman once told me that it is the mark of a small person who doesn’t (or can’t) say “Thank you,” and “Sorry.” Given that, this not a trick but certainly a tricky question: Is it easy or difficult for you to say “Thank you!” when and only when you mean it?

If gratitude is generally difficult for you to recognize or feel, I’m guessing it’s hard for you to take a (genuine) compliment or genuinely say thank you, in return. If this is you, stop, then start to grudgingly list whatever you feel, eh!, pretty good about: 1) your fuzzy high maintenance pets; 2) OK not horrible weather; 3) pretty good health; 4) old but running car; 5) boring job that pays the bills. Next, notice how those things make you feel: 1) being needed; 2) feeling less put out; 3) superiority that you’re not as sick as some; 4) lucky because of mobility; 5) good to be able to cover your basic needs. Lastly, give up some warm fuzzies for the next, higher level of that gratitude, you know, the stuff that’s even bigger than you — I am grateful for: 1) (pet) unconditional love in my life; 2) (weather) elevates my mood; 3) (health) being able-bodied is freedom and true wealth; 4) (car) any and all working transportation makes life easier and that’s more enjoyable; 5) (job) safety and some sanity makes me lucky!

Your BadWitch is an eternally optimistic non-Pollyana — I’m a fervent believer in the middle way. You can be grateful and say Thank you!, without being a sappy, vulnerable, or otherwise weak target. You know how great it makes you feel when someone thanks or acknowledges you — babycakes, when you give more, you get more. Gratitude is simply good for your health and wellbeing. Do it for you. No! Thank you.

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Juicy Relationship Coaching for Leaders and Individuals.

Mondays money, work, purpose dilemmas. Thursdays family, relationships, love dramedy. Send your brewing questions on how to thrive—not just survive— modern life to: coaching@stillsitting.net.

© 2009-2017 ManifestGroup. All rights reserved.

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3 responses to “Gratitude: “Thanks a Lot!” Gracious or Ungracious? (BW)

  1. Blessings, all! “The Pilgrims made seven times more graves than huts. No Americans have been more impoverished than these who, nevertheless, set aside a day of thanksgiving.” ~H.U. Westermayer http://on.fb.me/cpLZfn #quotes

  2. Amen to moderation, Kat. I’m no official historian of the food table, but I’m pretty darn sure it was a lot harder to eat and feed the fam back in ye olden days than in today’s MondoMarts’, which is WHY the original pilgrim Thanksgiving feast(s) were prepared and shared to thank their neighbors on a special day. If too many modern (over-) conveniences, stands to reason one’s “gratitude” and “feasting” become further and further distanced until (possibly) mindless. Celebrating family and friends is better done healthily (moderately, regardless of “-vore” status) and thoughtfully — for the least stress, most gratitude possible. Happy THANKSgiving, Kat!

  3. I am thankful for everything but most grateful that we celebrate Thanksgiving only one day out of the year because our family cannot just enjoy a simple piece of Turkey or Ham along with a salad, vegetable and light dessert. They insist on baking and bring every kind of casserole for which there is a written recipe. Living in a state with one of the highest obesity rates in the country, I would be a lot more thankful if some people would learn that less is more (when eating and speaking) and learn that leftovers can be a good thing (financially and physically).

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